Filtering the World Through Our Own Lens.

How Clearing Our Perspectives Leads to Authentic Connections

Each of us views the world through a personal lens~ one shaped by our past experiences, emotions, values, and beliefs. This lens influences how we perceive the people and events around us, sometimes in ways we don't even realize. While this an ability that helps us make sense of the world, it can also distort our reality, especially when it comes relationships with others.

We don’t always see people as they are; instead, we see them as WE ARE.

If we’ve had negative experiences with someone in the past or are holding onto old grudges, our lens becomes clouded towards other people in similar situations, we can start viewing people through that distorted filter. Rather than seeing them clearly, we might start to fixate on their flaws, misinterpret their intentions, or exaggerate their shortcomings.

We stop seeing them as they are, and start seeing them as we expect them to be. In doing this we build up a wall unfairly towards people.

But… what happens if we take a step back and clear that lens?

If we start to see people as they truly are~ without the weight of our own emotional baggage~ its only then that our connections with others start to transform.

We open the door to genuine, authentic relationships built on understanding rather than bias and judgment.

Our lens is shaped by so much more than the present moment. Past experiences, especially painful ones, create biases and emotional filters that we project onto others. If someone hurt us before, we definitely anticipate that they’ll do it again.

If we’ve built up resentment towards them, every action they take can feel like further evidence to justify that negative view.

But here’s the catch: often, the way we see people says more about us than it does about them. Our unresolved emotions, our need to protect ourselves, or our preconceived notions all influence how we view others. And when our perspective is clouded, we don’t have the ability to really connect authentically.

The Impact of a Distorted Lens on Relationships

When we filter the world through unresolved emotions, it limits our ability to build genuine relationships. We don’t see others as they are, but as we expect them to be based on our past experiences. This leads to misunderstandings, miscommunication, and broken relationships.

The more clouded your lens becomes, the harder it is to connect with others on a deeper, more meaningful level.

Authentic connection requires vulnerability, openness, and empathy~ things that are difficult to access when your vision is distorted by old wounds or preconceived judgments.

Clearing Your Lens

The first step to clearing your lens is simply recognizing that your perceptions are colored by your emotions. It’s not always easy to admit that we’re not seeing someone as they truly are, but awareness is key to change.

Here are a few simple ways to start clearing your perspective:

1. Check your assumptions:
When you feel a negative reaction toward someone, pause and ask yourself, “Am I reacting to this person based on who they are right now, or am I letting past experiences or unresolved feelings influence my perception?” Challenging your assumptions can help you see the situation more clearly.

2. Practice empathy:
Try to step into the other person’s shoes and see the situation from their perspective. Empathy helps soften our biases and allows us to connect with others on a deeper, more compassionate level. Consider what they might be going through or why they acted the way they did~ this helps clear the lens of judgment. Empathy and understanding create a clear lens to view a person truthfully.

3. Let go of past hurts: Forgive! Holding onto resentment or grudges only keeps your lens clouded. It can be hard to let go, but forgiveness is key to moving forward. This doesn’t mean excusing harmful behavior, but it does mean releasing the emotional weight that keeps you stuck in viewing the world from old patterns of perception.

4. Be open to new possibilities: When you clear your lens, you allow yourself to see people in a new light. You might discover qualities in them that you hadn’t noticed before or find that they’ve grown and changed in ways you hadn’t allowed yourself to ever see. By being open to new possibilities, you create space for growth in yourself, and all your relationships.

5. Communicate openly: Misunderstandings often arise when we assume we know how someone feels or what they’re thinking. People seem to decide they “know a person” and never open themselves to see anything beyond that “knowing” Clear communication helps eliminate the guesswork and ensures that you’re both on the same page. Rather than filtering someone’s actions through your own lens, ask them directly how they feel, what their perception is, or what they are thinking~ this builds trust and clarity.

The Freedom of Seeing People As They Are

When you let go of the filters that cloud your perception, you free yourself to experience authentic connections. You stop seeing others through the distorted lens of past hurts or biases, and you begin to see them for who they truly are. This doesn’t mean that everyone will meet your expectations or that every relationship will be without conflict. But it does mean that you approach others with more openness, empathy, and understanding.

Authentic connections only happen when we’re able to meet each other where we are… with clear eyes and open hearts. To see a person based on who they truly are, not who we’ve projected them to be.

At the end of the day, clearing your perspective isn’t just about how you see other people~ it’s about freeing yourself from the emotional baggage that you hold onto, that holds you back.